This is a collection of reflections on the years before my ileostomy, the years where survival came first.

I explores childhood, trauma, chronic illness and how the body is shaped by prolonged stress, instability and responsibility.

These pieces look back at the environments and experiences that influenced my health long before diagnosis or surgery and how a young body learns to endure when safety is limited.

This is about understanding rather than explanation. About tracing roots of illness with honesty and care and honouring the body that carried more than it should have to.

This section is for anyone who knows that illness doesn’t come out of nowhere